My readership has stabilized to about 4 hits a day. Nice number as this was primarily an online journal. My stuff on biology and science is mainly in rbiology.wordpress.com and my twitter.
Guess it is as good a time as any to pen down the thing that has been occupying my thoughts for the past few months. My mother.
Her cancer has undergone metastasis and moved to the lung. The first signs were her persistent cough and gradual loss of voice. When she consented to an x-ray, a dreaded shadow loomed at the center of the lung.
That was the explanation for all her symptoms, the shortness of breath, fatigue, and persistent cough. She was admitted for a CT scan and a biopsy. My buddy at SGH showed me the CT film and it was more cancer than lung, with secondary growth.
Could still remember that moment, I was sitting down beside the computer, looking at the screen and felt all the strength leave me.
So now its been about a month since the news. Mother was discharged and the family went back to the routine of spending more time back home.
Me? I now try to finish work early, take leave during chemo sessions to be with her, and try my very best to focus on my new portfolio.
A word on my new portfolio, I now have to set up the service-learning programme for the school, both local and overseas, largely by myself.
So how will things turn out? I am not sure really but things like this really surface things which we know is important and now is more immediate and urgent. Considered taking leave, yet you know you cannot really leave things undone and trouble others to pick up pieces after you.
She is, like all mothers, someone very dear and important to me. She is the reason I could have an education, working long hours in a factory to make sure my fees are paid and I could just focus on learning. I managed to even get a Masters and now a nice job.
So now you do what you can, count each day past as a great blessing and show your gratitude and try to make things better.
Like what Randy Pausch did: http://www.thelastlecture.com/index.htm